A Blind Date, Birdwatching and Belonging

When I left college in Texas in December 1979, I followed my parents to Denver, where my Dad’s employer, the USGS, had recently transferred him back to headquarters for the last couple of years before his retirement.

It was a new adventure for me.  My family hadn’t lived in Denver since one of Dad’s assignments at the beginning of third grade. Although I had cousins who lived in the northern suburbs, my parents decided to settle in the southern part of town, which was closer to my grandfather.

I was excited that we could now share holidays with many of our extended family, which had been impossible because of the constant transfers with my Dad’s career.

When I arrived, my best option was to live with my parents for a few months to pay off my car.  My new doctor, Dr. Ham, was the doctor who delivered me.  He and his wife had six children.  During one office visit, Dr. Hall asked if I might want to go on a blind date with his son, Tom, who was about my age.  Since I didn’t know anyone in Denver, I jumped at the opportunity to meet someone.  I was pleasantly surprised when he arrived at my parent’s house to pick me up.  He was about 6’ tall and had curly black hair.  Tom suggested we drive to the mountains to see all the beautiful foliage and birds.  He was driving, so I went along with the idea.

After driving for about an hour, as he was still at the wheel, he excitedly pointed up to the trees on my side of the car and said, “Look at that white-breasted nuthatch.”  I quickly turned my head in that direction to look out the passenger window, eyes darting from tree to tree, but I did not find any bird or animal.  I replied, “I didn’t see any birds. How could you see it while driving?”  He replied that he was a birdwatcher, and you train your eyes over time. He went on to explain that he had been a birder for years now. Colorado has more than 400 different species of birds, so it is a haven for birdwatching.

I’m sharing this story to stress the importance of looking at each other with eyes of curiosity and acceptance and being open to new people and their likes and differences.  God made each of us unique in our individual ways.  Yes, we have similarities, but we have differences too, and that’s okay.  That is what makes life interesting.  We have so much to learn from each other.  Life would be boring if we were all the same.

During our many transfers in nine states, my main wish was to be accepted by others.  To find a new friend in the new school.  To feel like one of the group.  That doesn't often come to your mind when you grew up in the same town as you were born.  Many of you probably have friends from your elementary classroom which have continued to junior high school and then high school.

It all goes back to the Golden Rule – “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” During my formative years, I remember that rule being posted in classrooms and reaffirmed by the teachers. How easily the rule has been forgotten these days.

So, while I close this post, I’d like to ask each of us to reach out to a new person or neighbor, to say “hi” or “have a nice day” to brighten their day.  To spread good vibes in someone’s direction.  To share a smile, which will make you both feel good.

A couple of websites that focus on belonging:

  1. https://news.uark.edu/articles/59408/explore-stories-of-belonging-and-tell-us-yours-on-the-new-belonging-website
  2. https://www.makeuseof.com/find-sense-belonging-social-well-being-online/

Have a blessed week!

All my best,

Julie

Throw Kindness Around Like Confetti

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One Comment

  1. Good advice Julie. Thanks for sharing. Hugs.